Displacement activity

I have always suffered from having a short attention span. I like to think that having such a lively, hyperactive mind like mine is a asset, rather than an affliction, but it certainly does not seem to mix well with PhD research. I have managed to turn work displacement activity into an artform at which I excel. Take last week for example, the grand total contribution to my PhD of my working hours last week resulted in the creation of ONE EMAIL. Thats it. A single email. Thats all I managed to write. It was, naturally, a perfectly crafted piece of genius as emails go ..a well thought out update full of vague detail (my specialty), with just the right tone to make it seem like I'm working hard but without having to hide my new found dedication to my extra-curricular activities. I do get the feeling however, that maybe I should step up the old productivity a gear or two if I am to get this PhD finished ..or indeed started for that matter. Last week was the exception though. I mean, I usually write at least 3 or 4 emails a week normally. But this last week saw the start of my new found obsession with climbing... and a little jolly up to Glenshee to try snowboarding in Scotland. And I think I am entitled to a week off to play every now and again. And again.

So firstly - boarding in Scotland is not for the faint hearted. When piste conditions were described on the snow report as "good", I think we could be excused for then being a little surprised to find ourselves going over grass (yes, grass), and rocks, indespersed with slush. Not one to wuss out infront of the hardened Scottish skiiers, and safe in the knowledge that my bottom was being safely looked after by my protective padded shorts, I decided to go all out for it anyway. And I have to say, once you get over the whole lack-of-snow-thing, skiing in Scotland is really not that bad afterall. Plus the bonus is that it was only a 90 minute drive from our door. Winner! Sadly, the days where 4 feet of snow cover every last inch of the Cairngorms are long since over. But so long as you are prepared to face everything that Scottish slopes have to throw at you, and don't mind having a huge arse in padded shorts, you can't really beat skiing in your own country. Hurrah!

Then, last Wednesday, I found myself entered in the Scottish Universities bouldering competition over in Edinburgh. As you do. For those that don't know; bouldering is basically climbing up walls but without ropes, although its usually to a smaller height. And with safety mats. If you're lucky. Its a good way to practice your climbing skills and be generally monkey-like. Its also a good way to practice falling from some quite considerable heights and really appreciate the genius that are safety mats. I had never tried bouldering before, but didn't see why this should stop me from entering the competition. Once we arrived at the comp (a little late thanks to minibus and undergrad related silliness) climbing was soon underway. With 20 problems to tackle, the tactic was to pace yourself. Which, of course, I didn't. The first 10 problems were already getting quite tricky and pretty much seperated the boys and girls. The climbs between 11 and 15 proved even more nasty. Climbs between 16 and 20 entitled you to freak-of-nature status, and were impossible for the majority of entrants. Which of course didn't stop us from trying them anyway, and so generally making tits of ourselves. I managed to finish 3rd out of the girls for Stirling Uni. Something I am quite proud of actually considering my "rugby playing" physique and beer-toned belly. I decided that I have a distinct genetic disadvantage in my reach, given that my limbs look like I am Spawn of Umpa-Lumpa rather than having the elegant long reach of other climbers. Just goes to show how far you can get with sheer bloody-mindedness. So Stirling University came 5th - woohoo! ..out of 6 universities - boo hiss! Which isn't that great. BUT is still an improvement on last year's 6th place. Rah! Also when you factor in that Glasgow (who won the competition) has a student body of 40,000 students, whereas Stirling has a mere 6,000... we totally rocked! Hurrah!

After the excitement of the competition, I made up my mind to get really serious about climbing. So I went out and did what I always do when I am serious about something. I bought a book. Wicked. Yet another way I can avoid reading my own subject yet still feel like I am being productive. I have also befriended Kris and Maria who I have decided are going to teach me to be a better climber - in return for the use of my chauffeur like qualities (I'm the only one with a car). Its a good, fair deal. Mutual exploitation at its best. Yesterday was a gorgeous sunny spring day, so we went out to Benny Beg, a rock face near Creif, to play around on some real rock. Now, this was the first time that I had ever been outdoor climbing before, and so I was ever so slightly just bricking it a little really. There are no mats you see outdoors, and I had become quite appreciative of the joys of mats on Wednesday. However, under Kris' expert tutilage, and Maria's encouragement I found I was well at ease. So much so that by the end of the day I was actually leading the climbs!! This is where you climb without a top rope for safety, and so your only protection is by clipping yourself in to bolts in the rock as you go up! *gulps* Again, no one died - which is, apprently, a good sign of a successfull day's climbing. Hurrah!